Loosened from the mud, I find myself floating in a world of possibility.

So can you.

Outside Thanksgiving

from the journals of 2003....

hanging in others' property
are the bleeding carcases of deer in groups of two and three
so casual - picturesque, almost
morbidly so.

I felt the disturbance in the air
the minute I arrived.
Something not right
just a mere 400 feet away.

Deer medicine speaks of gentleness
compassion and unconditional love.

I trouble with this
my mind unwilling to accept what is
flowing from my heart.

At this point, origins are unknown
the land around me is stark
colder and more harsh than I expected.
Fallen snow carves odd shapes on the fallen logs.
It seems as desolate as the desert.

Yet the hanging deer are undeniable evidence of
the vitality of this land
The abundance of wildlife -
We have seen none as of yet.


For over twenty-five years, the land has been peaceful and nurturing. Now the woods are full of this:

There is no understanding coming to my mind, no poems about death and rebirth, just callous and peace-shattering emotions.